I remember coming across this article in the Chicago Tribune last fall and was shocked with what I read.  There is a new national survey by the Girl Scouts Research Institute that found that girls 14 to 17 years old often portray themselves in social media as “fun,” “funny” or “social,” rather than smart and ambitious.  Girls shy away from portraying themselves as too smart or too ambitious for fear of not fitting in with a particular group.  Girls often want to feel “cool” and so they say and do things they wouldn’t ordinarily do just so they can feel like they fit in.  This is not a new problem but now with social media, this has just amplified this problem in young girls.

More than ever, young girls need a safe space where they can be themselves.  This is ME continues to help Chicago girls thrive, even in our ever-changing world!

Here is a link to read the full article:

http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2010-11-12/news/ct-met-trice-girl-scouts-1112-20101112_1_social-media-social-networking-teen-girls

Approximately one year ago I made the decision to pack up a handful of my belongings, put the rest in storage and set off on an adventure in Asia. I took a position teaching art and literature at an American school in Hsinchu, Taiwan. Teaching has turned out to be everything I expected and nothing at all that I expected. It has impacted my world and my view of the world at large to an intense degree. In light of the work I had been doing with This Is ME before I left on my adventure, I think I’ve looked at this experience from a unique perspective. It has been rewarding to know our students and learn about what drives them and what discourages them.

I think all schools are a community and should encourage their students to respect and contribute to their community in a positive light, but sometimes I feel that it is especially important to push this in our school. We have a small and culturally diverse student body that is comprised of 60 students ranging in age from 8 to 18 that hail from: Taiwan, Korea, Malaysia, France, Canada, South Africa, and the United States. Our students speak anywhere from 2-4 languages a piece. Some of them have grown up in Taiwan. Some of them have been living abroad for several years now. Some of them are brand new to this ‘international community’. As an adult I found the transition difficult. So I couldn’t help but think – growing up is hard and growing up while throwing one of the following into the mix: a new school, in a new country, in a potentially new or second language with students that span several different continents and several wildly different cultures, must be even harder. Especially for those students in the (often dreaded) Middle School age range. You’re struggling through the formation of a physical self. You’re struggling through the formation of peer relationships. School is getting intellectually harder. Your teachers and your parents are expecting you to have more self-discipline and to properly manage your own time and increased work load. Would there be some sense of general camaraderie among the students as they navigate an environment that could easily feel alienating? Would this cause a greater divide among them? With all the sincere and overwhelming stress that I felt these students might face, would they have less time to be concerned with the superficial pressures of the world and their peers? I am here to tell you, for the most part: teens still have plenty of time to be concerned with the superficial no matter their home country, current location, cultural background, appearance, or native language.

As a group my middle schoolers have struggled, academically and socially, this year. I have seen the most struggles with our female middle school students though. As someone who has worked with girls in this age range previously and who conveniently used to BE a girl in this age range, I empathize with them. They get angry with each other. They become jealous of each other. The new girl comes to town and regardless of whether she is actually cooler or just new; she attracts attention and rearranges alliances. They compete with each other. They lash out at each other when they don’t know what to do with or don’t understand their own emotions. They’re afraid of being embarrassed. They’re hard on themselves. They suffer extreme insecurities. They succumb to gossip. They want boyfriends. They read fashion magazines. A girl’s idea about beauty and popularity and what it means to be a girl might vary and be unique based on her individual cultural background – but they all have ideas about beauty and popularity and what it means to be a girl and these things influence them and can breed disappointment.

My observations may seem totally apparent to some readers. Some of you may be out there shaking your heads and thinking “of course girls around the globe share the same struggles!” I’d traveled previously and considered myself to have a well-rounded, cultured and observant head on my shoulders. I am learning so much about the world and humanity here though. I believe living abroad is an experience everyone should have. My students’ struggles with each other have been wearing and emotional for me at times. It’s hard to build a relationship with these girls, see parts of yourself in them, and see them struggle. I sometimes find it comforting though too. It doesn’t just make me realize that there is a certain sense of unity among girls and women (and people) everywhere, it makes me FEEL it. I wish every girl in the world could know what how that feels. We are not so far from each other in our ideals and concerns and questions and self doubt.

What another great reason for us to get out in the world and our communities and help each other through the rough spots. Not that we needed another reason other than, just to help each other through the rough spots.

So one of my favorite organizations, The Girl Effect, just posted this great story of an all-boys high school in Australia that started a movement for gender equality.  They created a video and presented it to their peers, encouraging each one to turn things around for girls and women.  It’s the “Boy Effect” for the Girl Effect – and it’s wonderful.  Great job Sydney Boys School!

Every year we offer two 6-week Exploration programs where girls get to meet women from different backgrounds and explore a theme like careers, cultures, and the arts.  I was so excited that this year, when the world celebrates International Women’s Day for the 100th time, our spring Exploration would be Women Who Rock Exploration.  Little did I know I would end up in tears.

Our six super special guests are facilitating dynamic activities and conversations that help This Is ME’s girls relate to trailblazing women ranging from suffragists to film editors.  Last week Betsy Sobiech, a founding partner of ClearSpace and Tiara International, introduced us to India.Arie.

Betsy started by having the girls and volunteers reflect on their favorite musician and what about his/her/their music we most appreciated.  Then she had us listen to a few of India.Arie’s most poignant songs and told us a bit about her background.  For those who don’t know, this 35 year-old is a singer, songwriter, producer, musician, advocate, and philanthropist.  Betsy shared some of India’s best quotes such as:

“I want people to hear my music for a long time … for this generation to say decades from now: ‘This still says what I think’ and girls who are 11 now, who were 1 when I wrote ‘Video,’ can say, ‘That’s how I feel.’”

“Everybody’s looking for ways to feel better –– the world is so unpredictable, people are looking inside themselves to ask what’s meaningful in life. My music has always addressed this.”

Then Betsy led an exercise to help us look at what’s meaningful to us and to put it into song lyrics.  She had the best formula I’ve ever seen for extracting meaningful, creative written word from our girls – and volunteers!  Her visioning exercise inspired me to write about my baby, Elliot.  I couldn’t believe what I was able to come up with.  By the time I was done (in 10 minutes or less), I had tears in my eyes because I had a beautiful, tangible creation to conjure up feelings and memories that had been mostly intangible.

At This Is ME, we challenge girls to put themselves out there so I’m challenging myself to bravely share this song with the fbook/blog world.  Who knows, maybe someone will be moved to write the music to the Elliot song.  Or maybe write lyrics of their own.  To see find out the formula for this kind of songwriting, visit www.thisismeinc.org/forgirls.html

I am joyful
I am in E’s room
I am surrounded by toys
I’m rolling on the floor

I am in E’s room
I am free to be me
I’m rolling on the floor
I’m thrilled to be part mama, part child

I am free to be me
I am relieved (…from it all)
I’m thrilled to be part mama, part child
I’m grateful to know there is no wrong me

I am relieved (…from it all)
I am freed
I’m grateful to know there is no wrong me
Finally

I am freed
I am surrounded by toys
Finally
I am joyful

Now, for real lyrics done right: check out India.Arie’s video “Video”:

Recently I listened to a smart and talented friend of mine express her anxiety about completing her applications and getting into one of her preferred doctoral programs. I completely understood her anxiety. It takes a good deal of time and effort to find the programs and complete the applications, and I know it’s nerve-wracking to wait and hear whether you get accepted. And…I knew that she would get into a program that she loved. I had complete trust in her and the schools and the universe that she would find and be accepted into the program she most wanted.

Read the full post

I am in the process of writing a book, and lately I’ve been having a hard time staying motivated. (Well, let’s be honest, it’s not only a recent problem!) It’s got me thinking about how we stay engaged and inspired and on track with our long-term commitments.

You may have something that you care about that you’ve been working on over time. It may be your work, being involved in your kids’ school, making a difference in your community, writing a book, or something else. Like many of us, you may also struggle to stay motivated in this area even though it’s something you say you care about and that you know you care about.

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If you are a victim of bullying, remember: those who seek to hurt others are the ones who are hurting the most!

Kate Halloran
Board Member

With all of these new things happening, it’s easy to get overwhelmed, and feel pulled in a million different, exciting directions.  In the frustration of trying to do twelve different things at once this morning, I stopped for a minute to really consider what I was working on, and I couldn’t help but smile.  I feel involved.  I feel engaged.  I feel helpful.  It’s awesome.  I love those moments when everything sort of shifts into perspective, and you realize that what you’re doing makes you happy.

So, let us know, what gives you those warm fuzzies?  What makes you connected, or like you’re part of something larger?  I hope that you’ll share your stories with us – it’s so inspirational to hear about other people doing what they love!

Here’s to the start of a new season!
~Meg

Live in the moment. Taking a minute to enjoy “the now” can make all the difference. Take a deep breath. Don’t dwell on the past or worry about what’s to come in the future.  You are right here, right now, so enjoy!

Give one person a compliment every day (or more!). I know you’re wondering, what has this got to do with my happiness?  Complimenting someone from their looks to a job well done makes them feel better about themselves, which in turn can make you feel more positive.  Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone unexpected compliment you today?

Laugh at the little things.  Don’t take yourself too seriously.  Life is never perfect and you must learn to roll with the punches.  Finding humor in everyday occurrences can significantly lower your stress level and people are naturally drawn to a friendly smile!

~ Kate Halloran
TIME Board Member &
Chair, Development Committee

Now that the weather here in Chicago finally feels like spring, we’ll be taking the girls on a nature scavenger hunt in Logan Square as part of our Mother Nature and Me program.  There are a surprising number of birds, as well as a wide variety of vegetation, in the area, so the girls will have their work cut out for them! 

We are also very excited the Writing Workshop that Board Member Meg Renehan will be leading this summer!  Board Member Lindsey Groves will be leading a Math Workshop for the girls this fall.  Logan Square Program Directors and Board Members, Lucia Giudice and Jenny O’Grady, are also planning a Science Exploration Series in the fall, which will be funded by a grant from the Who Foundation.  We are planning to teach the girls about the scientific methods through hands-on experiments, as well as have some very talented women from different scientific disciplines talk to the girls about careers in science.  This exploration series will culminate with the girls conducting an experiment over several weeks and present their results at a Science Fair to which we will invite their families and friends!

Looking forward to some great fun and learning with the girls in the Logan Square program!